Dear Pastor,

Greetings. This is the first time I am writing to you but I am a regular reader of your column. I am a college student and I am in love with one of my fellow students but it is causing problems because most of my friends are males. And my boyfriend is very jealous and is always accusing me of things that I am not doing. He says that he is serious about the relationship.

He came to visit me during the summer here and my parents like him. My father asked him what is his intention and he told my father that he would like to marry me, but I am very popular so he does not know if I am serious. My father told him that he will not get involved with our little problem but he does not want any man to fool me. So, if he is not serious he should let me know.

buying puss in bag

Pastor, we have never had sex because I am a Christian. Although he does not have locks, he claims that he is a Rastafarian. I cannot let my parents know that he says he is a Rasta. He told me that the only way he would marry me is if we have sex before, because he is not buying puss in bag. The other problem is that he has not given me anything since I know him, not even a card on my birthday.

On Valentine's Day I was expecting a gift, but he said he does not believe in that. He does not want me to wear pants or to do my hair. Sometimes I am confused, but I try to keep everything down because I love him.

F.E., Westmoreland, Jamaica

Dear F.E.,

This relationship will not work unless you are willing to become a Rastafarian or to do whatever this man says. This man does not want you to process your hair and you see nothing wrong with processing your hair. He does not want you to wear pants and you see nothing wrong with wearing pants. He wants to engage in pre-marital sex and you are not in that. Both of you are clearly unequally yoked.

This young man has never expressed his love by giving you a gift. He is too mean and selfish. I do not know what you have seen in him. But I repeat, the relationship will not work, so you need to cut the rope now and let him go his way. Men are not so scarce that you will not find your match. This has nothing to do with his Rastafarian belief. Intelligent Rastas know how to share with and appreciate their women.

Pastor